Building Your Surrogate Support System

Surrogacy is one of the most generous acts someone can offer to another person. Surrogacy has made tremendous strides in popularity over the decades. Since the first successful gestational pregnancy in 1985, the demand for this third-party reproduction has grown exponentially. Couples who previously were not able to conceive on their own, as well as LGBTQ+ and single intended parents, can experience the joys of parenthood thanks to the generosity of surrogates.

While the choice to become a surrogate is massively rewarding, the journey itself can be challenging at times. Carrying a pregnancy and delivering a child is no easy feat; it requires great fortitude and patience. Having a strong personal support system as a surrogate is crucial for having a positive experience. No surrogate is an island and every surrogate needs people in their life who will support them through all the highs, lows, and in-betweens that can come up in a surrogacy journey. If you’re considering embarking on the journey of becoming a surrogate, here’s what you should keep in mind when it comes to building your surrogacy support system

Who Is Part of Your Support System?

A surrogate’s support system typically includes:

  • Your partner, if applicable
  • Your parents and/or other family members
  • Your children (dependent upon their age)
  • Your closest friends
  • Your surrogacy agency case manager
  • Others who have used or been a surrogate

First and foremost, it’s paramount that everyone over the age of 18 living in your household is ready to commit to the process. Surrogacy impacts a surrogate’s entire family, so they need to be on board from the very beginning. Choosing who to include in your personal support system outside of your household, however, is more flexible. This is an exciting time for you, so it’s best to only include those who will bring a positive light to your experience.

Surrogate Appreciation from Recipient Family

Ultimately, surrogacy is a partnership between two families coming together to bring life into the world. In many cases, intended parents play a very active role in the surrogacy process and develop strong bonds with their surrogates. They may show their empathy and support for their surrogates by:

  • Sending hand-written cards and letters
  • Staying in touch through email, phone, and occasional visits
  • Sending gifts and care packages

How to Include Your Personal Support System

You have the support of your loved ones. Now what? Now, you can decide how to include them in your life during this time. This may be a hectic time, but with family and friends beside you, you will feel more at peace. Including them in your surrogacy journey can mean many things, including:

  • Asking them to accompany you to appointments
  • Talking about what to expect during pregnancy
  • Allowing them to help with your daily chores or tasks, such as cooking, cleaning, or helping out with your children
  • Spending time together, whether that means getting your nails done, going to lunch, or running errands together

Get in Touch with Yourself and Find Inner Peace

Your decision to choose surrogacy is an amazing one, but everything worth doing comes with potential challenges. You may be asked to share personal information with those outside your family or close friend circle or have conflicting emotions throughout the process. Though you may not be able to predict how every part of your surrogacy journey will go, getting comfortable with everything that makes your experience unique will make the possible discomfort of some moments easier.

Now more than ever, you need to feel your best. It’s important to maintain a serene and healthy environment for this new chapter of your life. Try to get a full night’s sleep every night, and lean on your support system if you feel you need help. Friends, family, and others who have embarked on this amazing journey of surrogacy will be there to help you through this time.

Enjoy the Journey

This is a special pregnancy that many won’t have the opportunity to participate in – celebrate it! Connect with other surrogates to talk about your experience and build a network of people who truly know what you are going through, so you can truly soak up all aspects of your choice.

If you have questions about the process or would like to start on your road to surrogacy, connect with Reproductive Possibilities today.

Questions About Becoming an Intended Parent or Surrogate?